Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Blah!

It seems that I write the most when I'm angered or hurt. I write most when I'm thinking of love. I seem to be a really insensitive person. That I'm totally selfish. How did I get that way? It sucks when you think about it. You try to be the best you can be, but you often slip into this repetitive stage. The stage that makes you start to hate yourself, but then leads you to take it out on others.
We want so much from other people,but we limit what we give to other people. Even when we give a lot we still lack something. It's sad.

I seem so focused on how someone treats me, but I never focus on how someone perceives me. That's foul. I do a lot, but it seems that I have a problem with doing what people ask of me. I like to do what I want to do. That's a bad trait to have I guess. It really seems that I'm in a vicious cycle with myself. I keep saying that I choose the wrong mate. Nah, I have to admit. I'm a bad person. I will trash my self, because I know that trashing myself is the only way I will wake up and smell the roses. Once this is posted for the world to see I will be free.

I think we need to continually work on ourselves daily. We take breaks often thinking we're perfect. No one outwardly admits that they are perfect, but sometimes I think people think they are inside. We always complain of others, always painting the kettle black.

These random words are just that. No method to my thoughts this morning. I promise to start writing more. Writing puts me into perspective. I need to stay there. I need to be where I'm going, because I'm losing myself. Losing myself in love!