Imploding
I have so much inside. So much to rid myself of. I have secrets that hurt and those secrets will probably make you run away. I wonder why you run away? I'm lying, I'm scared, I'm fake, and I'm apprehensive. I'm imploding.
I want to let it out, but than your a slave to your words. People hold you to what leaves your mouth, and even though there just words, they mean a lot. I want to tell you what's close to my heart. I want to tell you what hurts, but I can't. It's glued to my soul, glued behind my closet door. I'm imploding.
I'm trying to air it out and breath it out, but it's so hard. You'll view me differently, while losing feelings for me. I'm the one that has the problem, why run from me? Everyone says they want to help, but when you involve them, they take everything so personal.
I'm imploding because my secrets are laughed at and people run away as if I have the black plague. They don't give me the power that I need. People are so judmental. We're all perfect until an incident happens. So, I implode and crush my reputation. Instead of being a people person. I grow close to people, but don't allow others to grow close to me. It's over rated. It's real. I'm imploding.
I want to let it out, but than your a slave to your words. People hold you to what leaves your mouth, and even though there just words, they mean a lot. I want to tell you what's close to my heart. I want to tell you what hurts, but I can't. It's glued to my soul, glued behind my closet door. I'm imploding.
I'm trying to air it out and breath it out, but it's so hard. You'll view me differently, while losing feelings for me. I'm the one that has the problem, why run from me? Everyone says they want to help, but when you involve them, they take everything so personal.
I'm imploding because my secrets are laughed at and people run away as if I have the black plague. They don't give me the power that I need. People are so judmental. We're all perfect until an incident happens. So, I implode and crush my reputation. Instead of being a people person. I grow close to people, but don't allow others to grow close to me. It's over rated. It's real. I'm imploding.
posted by PhD Research in Business at
3:27 PM
4 Comments:
We all have things to hide but don't always have people to share.
Take advantage of people who want to listen, because everyone won't care.
You never know who will understand if you deny their ear.
Sometimes bonds are made stronger when secrets can be shared.
And why do you "wonder why you run away" if you say that, "I'm [you're] lying, I'm scared, I'm fake, and I'm apprehensive"? It should be pretty self explanitory. You answered you're own question.
People can only take so much. If you continue to push people away that care about you then you are going to end up alone. I know its difficult to let people in when you have so much hurt inside, but at some point in your life you are going to have to let go and trust someone. If you don't these feelings that you have inside, these secrets that you hold so dare, will eat you up inside. You never know who you push away by trying to protect your feelings. She could have been the one, he could have been the one, but because you refused to let them in, you'll never find out. Risk. Life is a risk. Giving our heart to someone is a risk. Letting go of our hurts, pain, and shame is a risk. But if you are willing to take the risk, it may pay off for you in the end. If you choose not to risk, then you choose to be chained by your certitude as a slave. You have forteited your freedom!
How long should someone knock on the door if they don't know what's behind it? If the benefit of sticking around is so great, than more people wouldn't run in the other direction. For those that choose to stay in your corner, where is the anticipation of reward and the comfort in knowing the good that is to come?
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